We’ve all been a jerk at one time or another in our lives. Ok – all except me.

Kidding. I’ve been the queen of jerks, for sure.

What is a jerk? 

The definition of jerk is a contemptibly obnoxious person. Yes.. I had to look up the word “contemptibly.”
If I may use a definition that doesn’t require a dictionary, I say a jerk is simply someone you can’t stand being around for longer than five minutes at a time. And truth is, we all have them in our lives.
There’s always that one person we dread being around every time his/her name is mentioned, because we know what a jerk they are. Again, I’ve been that jerk.

How do you become a jerk? 

Instead of telling you what not to do, I thought I’d share some tips on how you can sucessfully be a jerk and guarantee yourself a spot on the “no one wants to be around me” throne.
Constantly interrupt others when they’re talking. Everything you have to say is obviously more important than anyone else. You can pretend like you want to hear them, but we all know you don’t. So, simply wait for the right moment and draw the conversation back to you in the middle of someone’s else’s story.
Prove you are always right. I asked some friends to chime in on this discussion, and I couldn’t have said it better myself. 

a jerk is sure they are right and more right than you and you should be wrong if it makes feeling right feel more right to them.

Say that three times fast.
Lead your employees and colleagues with an iron fist. Don’t encourage them or tell them the good things they have done. Instead, mock them and degrade them in front of others to make sure you get your point across. Call them names when they make a mistake and do it loud enough for the rest of the office to hear.
This doesn’t make you a leader. It makes you a bad manager of those appointed to you.
Believe you are the center of the universe and everything revolves around you. Wait. Isn’t this the same thing as the first point? Maybe, but allow me to elaborate a little. To be a successful jerk, you must not only interrupt everyone else’s conversations to bring the attention back to you, but you must communicate this message to everyone.
Whether you’re on the phone, sending an email, or waiting in line to grab your to-go order that you happen to be 10 minutes early for but swear is late, you want everyone in the room to know that you are the VIP. Remember to speak louder than usual so everyone in the back can hear you.
Be holier than thou. This is where you pray with others around you. Again, make sure you’re loud enough for everyone to hear. After you ask God to bless the food and lift up the ones you love to be “safe, healthy, and prosperous,” all in Jesus’s name, you then repeat steps one through four to ensure you get the “biggest jerk” award.
To add a flare of drama to it, read through the book of Proverbs out loud, emphasizing the sin of pride. Then refuse to back down from a situation because you want to be right.
Don’t be a jerk. It’s really unattractive. It certainly doesn’t make people want to be around you, nor does it cause others to desire a relationship with the Jesus you talk about.
What did I miss? What other ways will ensure you are a successful jerk? Leave a comment below…